Why I No Longer Talk About Race With White People

After following the media coverage associated with a grand jury's decision not to indict Darren Wilson for shooting Michael Brown, as well as the divergent responses from white and black Americans, I decided that I was no longer going to discuss any issues involving race in a mixed race setting—in particular, one that includes white people.

This is because no matter what a black person says about racism, discrimination or racial profiling, most white people always seem to believe that they are the final arbiters on black people's experiences in America; on whether our claims of racism and discrimination are valid; on whether we are entitled to feel aggrieved by the injustices we THINK we have faced; on whether we are competent; and on whether we are deserving of the same rights, protections and opportunities that they feel are their birthright as Americans.

After years of conversations—in college classes and cocktail parties—I have realized that white people subconsciously believe that their opinion on the black experience trumps my actual experience  as a black woman, and that no amount anecdotal or actual evidence will change what they have decided is the truth about black people's lives and experiences in this country.

More important, I am refusing to discuss racism with white people because they're generally uninvested in ending it, so these conversations are at best, feel good opportunities for those that think it's wrong and blame game sessions for those who believe it either doesn't exist or that what blacks perceive as racial bias against all of us is justified by the actions of some of us.

As I get older, I can no longer afford to frustrate myself by discussing issues that impact MY life with people who believe that they know more about me and my experiences than I know about myself; especially, when I know that my perspective only matters if it validates theirs. Moreover, I'm at a point in my life where I cannot afford to invest my limited free time in unproductive discourse that will lead to neither understanding nor resolution of a particular problem.

So instead of wasting my time on fruitless attempts to influence white America's opinions and attitudes regarding race and racial injustice, I plan to avoid such conversations, opting instead to talk about the Saints' dismal record, the merits of okra versus filé gumbo or any other topic about which I know my opinion will be accepted.

Why I Wasn't With Mary

When people ask why I refused to vote to re-elect Sen. Mary Landrieu and supported her GOP opponent, Rep. Bill Cassidy, I point to a meeting I attended in 2006 with her and a recently elected senator from Illinois, where she promised to provide resources for recovering minority and small businesses.

This promise was delivered in the form of  a $1 Billion in special GO Zone New Markets Tax Credits that were supposed to be used to finance business and real estate investment opportunities in "severely  distressed" neighborhoods like parts of the Ninth and Seventh Wards, but were primarily used to finance her brother's Broadway South fantasies (maybe he thought he'd get a chance to use his undergraduate drama training), "mixed-use" downtown buildings offering high-rent apartments that 80+% of the city's residents can't afford or hotels offering wages so low that most employees have to work two jobs just to afford rent in those STILL underserved neighborhoods. 

This was was delivered in the form of BILLIONS of dollars of Disaster Recovery Community Block Grant funds she lobbied for that were supposed to create thousands of "quality" construction and permanent jobs for local residents, along with sustainable business opportunities for local disadvantaged businesses, but came with a waiver of the local hiring and prevailing wage provisions typical for such funds, allowing contractors to hire out-state and even undocumented foreign workers, leaving blacks even more under- & unemployed than they were before Katrina.

On the other hand, made an effort to research and meet Bill Cassidy, and wound up impressed by his work creating community clinics, his commitment to providing educational opportunities and resources for children with learning challenges, and his belief in empowering people to help themselves through entrepreneurship versus empowering established businesses to maintain the economic status quo—it should be noted that the Small Business & Entrepreneurship gave him a 100% rating on supporting favorable legislation, while Mary Landrieu only received a 58% rating.

While Cassidy may not deliver anything to help the people Mary promised to help during that meeting, I already know that Mary hasn't done it so I'm willing to take my chances on someone else and vote against him, if he fails to deliver over the next six  years.

Racism is NOT A Black Problem

For centuries, the wealthy white male power structure (WWMPS) has used racism (and all of the other isms) to justify treating people as less than so they can take more of. 

Like dealers who need to get high on their own supply, the WWMPS has wholesaled racism to the rest of the white community to pay for its habit. By creating institutions and systems that extend the benefits of racism to all whites, the WWMPS has turned white people into paid racism stakeholders who are willing to maintain it, or at very least, unwilling to fight it.

These wages of whiteness—paid through preferential access to resources and opportunities, as well as insulation from the injustices and negative outcomes faced by non-whites in similar circumstances—are paid to all white people, regardless of whether they have a hand in creating or maintaining it. As a consequence, the wages of whiteness are often too attractive to refuse, and too easy to disavow.

Unfortunately, the wages of whiteness are like an addiction for which the "antidote is also the poison", because only white people can fix the problem they've created. With every addiction, there are addicts who try to assuage their guilt by blaming others for their habit. With racism, this group typically justifies it as merely a by-product or consequence of the actions or behaviors of non-whites.

In general, white people are too 

addicted to the wages of whiteness to simply give them up. This is why almost two centuries of economic, moral and political efforts have done little to end racism. 

When the only person who has the ability to fix a problem benefits from its existence, any resolution is improbable. So until white people collectively admit that racism is a problem that needs to be fixed and that it is their problem to fix, racism will exist until the concept of race is no longer valid or relevant.

How The Media's Mirror Reflects The Black Community

One of the most popular recent stories in the Times-Picayune (T-P), the paper of record in New Orleans, has been recent release of Lil Boosie, from the Louisiana State Penitentiary after serving three years of an eight year sentence for drug possession and intent to distribute.   While Lil Boosie's release has been a prominent story, the recent death of Chokwe Lumumba, a man who was an advocate for the poor and disenfranchised, as well as the mayor of the largest city in Mississippi has been completely ignored.  In addition to posting at least a half dozen articles in the five days since his release, the paper's website recently participated in and live-streamed a press conference with the Baton Rouge rapper and parolee, who was acquitted of one murder-for-hire charge while he was in prison but remains a suspect in two more, who recently posted a video on Instagram of his seven year old daughter cursing like an irate sailor and whose total CD sales wouldn't even earn him a gold record.

There are those in the Black community who will undoubtedly call me a "hater" for criticizing the T-P's love fest with Lil Boosie, but there is no justification for celebrating someone who not only promotes thuggish behavior in his music, but embodies it in his lifestyle.  Moreover, covering the prison release of a quasi-celebrity rapper, while ignoring the death of a world-renown activist and politician, is not much different than putting stories about Black criminals on the front page while burying ones about Black achievement in the lifestyle section..

It is an accepted notion that—through their reporting—journalists are merely "holding up a mirror to society," and that their stories are accurate reflections of the people and events they chose to cover.  Unfortunately, it is also an accepted notion that journalists tell us everything we need to know about our society.  So if the only stories about Black people they chose to tell are ones that portray us as thugs, addicts, criminals and poor parents, the implication is that the personal characteristics and behaviors of this group are the sum of our reality and existence.

When the worst of us is celebrated while the best of us isn't even worth mentioning, the message to our children is that the values and social norms of the former are to be embraced while those of the latter can be ignored.  Through their in-depth coverage of Lil Boosie and virtual news blackout on the life and death of Mayor Lumumba, the T-P's mirror is one that reflects the lowest common denominator in the Black community and promotes thug life as our ideal life.

We Ain't Alright

Depending on whom you talk to and which neighborhood that person lives in, New Orleans is either thriving under Mayor Mitch Landrieu, or we’re still suffering eight years after Chuck D penned these lyrics in response to seeing Black New Orleanians struggle after Katrina:

Urgency

State of emergency

Shows somebody’s government

Is far from reality….

New Orleans in the morning, afternoon, and night

Hell no, we ain’t alright.[1]

Mayor Landrieu claims that under his administration, we are improving and moving forward as “One City,” but if you drive through and talk to people in various neighborhoods, you will hear a tale of two cities—one that has thrived and benefitted from his term in office, and one that has been neglected.

In THEIR New Orleans, the CBD and French Quarter have been spruced up with freshly paved streets and sidewalks, along with new palm trees that are regularly strung with Christmas lights to celebrate the holidays and major tourism events like the Super Bowl, NBA All-Star Weekend and Mardi Gras. In MY New Orleans, people in predominantly Black neighborhoods like the Seventh Ward and Gentilly are living with broken street lights and sidewalks.

In THEIR New Orleans, money from the DOT's Submerged Roads Program is available for fixing Uptown streets like Magazine and Jefferson that never saw a drop of water during Katrina. In MY New Orleans, streets in Katrina-flooded neighbors like Broadmoor and Gert Town remain cracked and caving in almost nine years after the waters subsided.

In THEIR New Orleans, the city and school board have spent BILLIONS on new schools and public facilities. In MY New Orleans, the unemployment rate for the city's Black residents is one of the highest in the country.

In THEIR New Orleans, three police cars arrive within 15 minutes, in response to a security alarm at a Garden District residence.  In MY New Orleans, the police take over 30 minutes to respond to a 911 call from a homeowner in New Orleans East who's just been in a shootout during an attempted home invasion.

While people who in Uptown neighborhoods, the French Quarter or the CBD enjoy newly paved streets, reliable police services, a responsive City Hall and an overall improved quality of life that makes them feel the city is doing well, the people in MY New Orleans are living with broken street lights, pot-holed streets, high crime and higher unemployment rates.  So when people tell me New Orleans is doing great under Mayor Landrieu, I just tell them that while certain parts of New Orleans may be doing well, the people in my part of town "ain't alright."

---

[1] Lyrics from the song “Hell No, We Ain’t Alright” on the album Rebirth of a Nation by Public Enemy, 2005

 

 

The Asterisk In The Room

Social media is on fire talking about Richard Sherman's interview with Stephen A. Smith and Skip Bayless, during which he reads, writes and erases the latter for attempting to minimize his achievements.

As a fellow former college athlete and Stanford graduate, the exchange between Sherman and Bayless resonated with me personally.  Whenever I tell someone that I went to Stanford, I typically omit the fact that I was on the women's track team because the face of the person I'm talking to generally takes on an "it makes sense" look, as if the only way I could have possibly attended and graduated from such a prestigious and academically rigorous institution was if I'd been recruited to be some kind of college gladiator.
Even after I disclose that my admissions application included National Merit Semi-Finalist and National Achievement Finalist awards, three elected student offices (including the student body presidency during my senior year), a varsity letter in three sports and a transcript that included both high school AP and junior college classwork. Even after disclosing that I'd also been courted by West Point, MIT, Berkeley and CalTech, I still feel as if the person I'm talking to has put an invisible asterisk next to name to remind him or her that my athleticism somehow proves the implausibility of my proclaimed intellectualism and that my academic achievements are somehow fraudulent.

While black graduates from prestigious universities regularly face skepticism regarding their qualifications and achievements, those of us who were scholar-athletes at these institutions are treated like world recordholders with asterisks besides our names. To people like Bayless, our accomplishments and intellect are never afforded the same level of respect and regard as those of our white peers, and are often as discounted as a world record finish in the 100 meters, accomplished below sea level and with a strong tailwind.

Instead of acknowledging Sherman's athletic and intellectual exceptionalism, people are looking for reasons to discredit and diminish him. If he wasn't one of the best at what he does, he wouldn't still be in the league and his team wouldn't be going to the Super Bowl. And if he wasn't smart, he wouldn't have been able to get into and graduate from Stanford, or have been accepted into one of the school's graduate programs.
Richard Sherman is absolutely justified in being proud of his accomplishments, and in taking umbrage at anyone who dare dismiss them as anything but exceptional. In less than a quarter of century he has accomplished more than some people do throughout their careers. Not only has he managed to pass through the filters of being one of the best high school football players in the country, being one of the best college players in the country and being one of the best professional players in country, he has become part of the academic elite, having attended and graduated from one of the top academic institutions in the world.

In a few weeks, Richard Sherman and the Seahawks will take the field and attempt to bring home their team's first Vince Lombardi trophy. Win or lose, Sherman's detractors will be hard pressed to prove that he didn't deserve to be on that field or that his success warrants any type of asterisk or disclaimer.
The next time someone questions my qualifications or looks at me with incredulity when I tell them I went to Stanford, I'm going to take a page out of Richard Sherman's book and tell them that not only am I alumna, I am also a former student athlete which makes my accomplishments all the more exceptional and not less.

The Bash Brothers

When Don Imus referred to the predominately-black, Rutgers womens basketball team as "nappy headed hoes" in 2007, every black male public figure— from Al Sharpton to Prof. Boyce Watkins—expressed outrage and demanded that he be fired. Now six years later, some of these same black male public figures are the ones disparaging us and the silence  from our community leaders is deafening.

Earlier this week, after reading an article Prof. Watkins posted on Facebook claiming that single black mothers are raising sons who don't have adequate life skills—probably the fourth negative article about black women that he's posted since the new year rang in—I pointedly asked him why he felt the need to regularly attack black women, and this was his reply:

"...if being fair means attacking black women, then consider yourself attacked."

In the interest of fairness, it should be noted that black men are also guilty of exhibiting values and behaviors hat are self-destructive and detrimental to the overall wellbeing of their families and communities; however, Prof. Watkins and his fellow bash brothers are quick to blame everyone—from long dead slave masters to long suffering single mothers—but not black men for their choices and actions.  And while it has not only become acceptable, but de rigueur, for black men to publicly shame black woman for everything from bad parenting to bad weaves, people like Bill Cosby and Pres. Obama are taken to the community woodshed when they dare call black men to task for any real or perceived faults and failings.  Meanwhile, bashing black women has become so commonplace and prolific, that these bash brothers seem to relish coming up with increasingly crude but clever ways to disparage us. Over the past decade they've taken to calling and describing us by such monikers and epithets as chickenhead, sidepiece, bed wench, thirsty and ratchet—all of which they have liberally used in rap songs, YouTube videos, op-ed pieces, discussion forums and social media outlets.

Admittedly, are some young (and not so young) black women who are making poor personal choices, embracing negative behaviors and adopting values that are counterproductive to their individual and our collective well-being. However, there are many more of us who are ambitious, hard-working, God-fearing, self-respecting, family-loving, gracious, feminine and down right AWESOME. But instead of celebrating our virtues or promoting our achievements, bash brothers prefer to collectively portray us as gold-diggers, child support check-chasers, bad mothers, poor house-keepers and unfeminine harpies unworthy of any measure of respect or regard.

At the core of it, these actions are often  nothing more than efforts to control our behavior, silence our objections to theirs, and justify treatment or feelings about us that would otherwise be deemed misogynistic or racial self-loathing. It's as if bash brothers subconsciously believe that shining a light on our sins will keep their demons in the dark.

Even more egregious than the black men who bash black women out of (self-) hatred, are the ones like Prof. Watkins, Tommy Sotomayor and Tariq Nasheed, who bash us for profit. For them, membership in the bash brothers fraternity is an opportunity to raise their public profiles as black community thought leaders to garner speaking engagements, TV appearances and book deals. After Steve Harvey proved that publicly telling black women what is wrong with them is a sure route to book, radio and TV deals, every psuedo-intellectual brother with an Oedipus complex, a bad breakup or "baby momma" drama has sought the limelight by courting controversy with a "what's wrong with black women" YouTube video, podcast or op-ed piece. Realizing that their anti-black woman rhetoric could hardly be construed as the kind of racially-uplifiting discourse expected from someone purporting to be a black community, they immediately try to spin it as tough love, truth telling, or as Prof. Watkins claimed in his response to my post, "being fair."

Well if Prof. Watkins is seeking fairness, then allowing black men to bash us for power, punishment, profit or publicity should be as uncceptable as allowing Don Imus to bash us for public amusement.